Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Manic Depression is a frustrating mess

(Lyrics from Jimi Hendrix's Manic Depression)

My college roommate from freshman year once described his mom's severe bipolar disorder. When manic, she is phenomenally productive, creative and brilliant. When depressed she is unbearable, and unfortunately untreatable because her extremely sensitive brain chemistry would have a fatal reaction to existing treatments to bipolar disorder.

He informed me that he too had inherited this trait, which had already begun to reveal itself but would fully set in later in life. I think he may have been hiding behind this Jekyll persona to excuse his behavior as a stereotypical pre-med jackass. Jackass.

My manic-depression is more subtle, affecting my productivity and motivation more than my emotional state. It's a mostly self-induced problem resulting from my ADD and occasional inability to self-motivate, compounded by severe information overload. As a result I had cut back on posting temporarily until I found the right adjustments. But since this blog is an important outlet for me I will certainly continue to update it.

To make more time for posting I've cut back on my information intake from news/blog feeds. My 52 subscriptions generate around 250 posts per day (200 posts about 9/11 in the past week alone, and I'm sick of it). At 30 seconds per post it requires over two hours to read them all, giving me such a superficial scraping of the news that it's become a worthless investment of time. I'll let someone else separate the wheat from the chaff on sites like the Huffington Post, giving me more time to observe the weirder corners of the internet and bring my findings to you.

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